Not to worry, Tom and the kids are fine, no natural disasters, no one's been arrested or incarcerated, and the cat didn't die. Still, it's been enough stuff to make me think some days I've got PMS, post-partum, and post-menopausal whatever going on at the same time.
When Daddy died I kept telling Mama not to make any big decisions. I'd read/ heard somewhere it's just not a good idea right after a major life event.
And maybe for some, retiring from a part-time job after only five years doesn't seem like a big deal. But I loved my little school. If there hadn't been a change in administration, who knows how much longer I may have stayed. I'm still waiting for that scab to heal completely over.
I went back and double-checked, Dear Reader, but nowhere on any life event checklist did I find submitting a manuscript. Don't those people understand that we live and breathe our characters for years before we let them go?
It's like the first day of kindergarten for your first child. It's just school, for crying out loud. And even if other moms knowingly warn you, you still find yourself weeping on the front steps before your precious baby's bus gets to the corner. Perhaps letting go of anything we've invested a lot in takes its toll.
Oh, and just to make sure life never gets dull, we're in the midst of downsizing and getting our house ready to go on the market in March. I was fine about it until I was telling a friend it wasn't like Tom and I raised our kids in this house or community. And no, it isn't, but I like to think it's home away from home for Annalyn and Gracie who only know Grandpa and Allie living here...sigh.
Have you ever heard this little ditty:
Run in circles, scream and shout!
But when I stop running in circles, screaming, and shouting, I hear the Lord gently whispering:
1-4 But now, God’s Message,
the God who made you in the first place, Jacob,
the One who got you started, Israel:
“Don’t be afraid, I’ve redeemed you.
I’ve called your name. You’re mine.
When you’re in over your head, I’ll be there with you.
When you’re in rough waters, you will not go down.
When you’re between a rock and a hard place,
it won’t be a dead end--
Because I am God, your personal God,
The Holy of Israel, your Savior.
I paid a huge price for you:
all of Egypt, with rich Cush and Seba thrown in!
That’s how much you mean to me!
That’s how much I love you!
I’d sell off the whole world to get you back,
trade the creation just for you.
Isaiah 43:1-3 MSG
Lately I've come to know, really know, that we really need a little crazy, a little challenge, a little struggle once in a while. On that flat place, we have an opportunity to truly look around and see just how blessed we are. It's a good place to be still and listen to words of love from our Savior.