I've written a lot about my God-sized dream (giving hope to at risk kids). To me, it's huge and wonderful and vastly important. Sometimes I need to be reminded, it's my dream, tailor-made for me, not Tom's or the kids', or anyone else's. I need to be reminded that as incredible, and dare I say it, valuable, as I believe my dream to be, it's not likely to be as incredible or valuable to everyone in my world, or beyond.
So far, I can pinpoint three other God-sized dreams in my life, even though I didn't call them by that name. Mary began introducing me to dream terminology a few years ago. (I wonder if she knows she was a huge part of my first God-sized dream.) Not only did God plant the dreams in my heart, He led me to harvest.
But for one of the dreams, even when the harvest was over, I still kept trying to water and grow it. Have you ever been in a field after the harvest? When it's over, it's over. I falsely believed it was faith that kept me hanging on even when God shut door after door. Now, I think it may have been vanity, stubbornness or delusion, but it wasn't faith.
My current God-sized dream has been brewing in me far longer than I initially realized. This past year, I dove fully into it (admittedly, dragging poor Tom and the kids along at times). I've learned a great deal about a lot of things, some easier than others, and I know the Teacher still has lots for me to learn.
Right now, I'm involved in a couple of projects I was just sure were necessary in order for my dream to come to full fruition. I was putting my faith in events, people, funding. Guess what? I WAS WRONG!
On this side of my personal stupid, maybe it taught me something about faith. This time, it only took a few days instead of years, literally, for me to realign to my compass. This time, my heart and ears weren't so plugged with "reasoning " that I couldn't hear from the Lord.
Isn't it amazing the peace and confidence that "floods (our) soul(s)" when we "let go, and let God"? To me, that's when we practice faith. I'm not sure any of us ever becomes 100% faithful, but that's okay. Growing doesn't mean perfection.
I'm so thankful God continues to call or whisper or even take out the mallet in order to increase our faith, and draw us into a closer relationship with Him, aren't you? How do you know when your faith is growing? Or when it isn't?
11 Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.